Down With Julius

A short story about a shadowy figure. A warning of sorts.

He haunts my every waking moment.

Ever since that summer day two or so years ago, I haven’t gotten a moments rest. I am always on edge. Everywhere I go, I live in constant fear that he will appear with those beady eyes of his and stare straight into my soul.

I am, of course, talking about Julius Pringles. That smug face. His stupid mustache. He thinks he’s better than everyone else because he’s got a mustache that rivals no one. I hate that holier than thou attitude. He can go fly a kite.

Why me? Why must I live in eternal torment at the existence of such an accursed figure?

He acts so innocent. Trust me, he is anything but innocent. Those raised eyebrows of his are nothing more than a cruel ploy to gain the world’s favor. But I know the truth. Hell, I’ve been drowning in the truth for years.

“Oh look at me, I have this slight look of inquisitiveness on my face. I’m so friendly. I’m so approachable. I could do no harm.” Yeah, right.

I uncovered Mr. P’s dirty little secret no more than a few years ago. He knows I know the truth about him. That is why he wants to strike fear in my heart. That is why he has paralyzed me from taking any decisive action for so long.

Well listen here. I AM NOT AFRAID OF YOU ANY LONGER. I WILL NOT BOW DOWN. YOU HAVE NO POWER OVER ME. NONE. YOU HEAR THAT PRINGLES MAN? JULIUS “I’M BETTER THAN EVERYONE” PRINGLES?

I understand the danger of writing this message. I understand the danger of speaking out. But I am done hiding. I am done cowering in fear. The whole world will know it. Julius Pringles is up to something dastardly and he must be stopped.

I fear the repercussions for this courageous act may be severe. If you don’t hear from me again, you know who’s responsible.